By Maggie Berberian

Stages of grief – When we endure a painful loss just know that it’s not our fault. We have to live with the what-ifs and regrets. Our grief is not meant to be analyzed, it’s meant to be felt. These stages of grief listed below are not linear. Each individual is different when it comes to how they go through grief.

When a person has a difficult time coming to terms with the outcome of a diagnosis or loss that occurred. When in denial a person will continue to believe the more preferable outcome, using thoughts to justify and holding on to what they believe is a reality.

When a griever comes to terms with the loss they become angry. Frustration, fear and confusion fuel the anger as they struggle to come to terms with, “Why is this happening to me?”

Bargaining is when the griever tries to find ways around the outcome. When grieving a death the griever will try to bargain by promising something, to change, or to reform.

When a person has a difficult time coming to terms with the outcome of a diagnosis or loss that occurred. When in denial a person will continue to believe the more preferable outcome, using thoughts to justify and holding on to what they believe is a reality.

At this stage, the griever comes to embrace the reality and finality of what has happened.

Death of a loved one have stages of grief

Divorce has stages of grief

Relationships have stages of grief

Death of a Pet has stages of grief

Change of Residence has stages of grief

Career can lead to stages of grief

Financial Loss can give you stages of grief

Legal

Health Issues

Common Responses when Grieving:

Reduced Concentration

Numbness

Disrupted Sleep

Changes in Appetite

Emotional Roller Coaster

Unresolved Grief Symptoms:

Refusal to think about or talk about grief

Preoccupation with grief

Fear of thought and feelings

Isolation and avoiding relationships

Overindulgence in distractions.

The Importance of a Thriving Action Plan: Through the stages of grief

Those experiencing unimaginable loss can easily feel stuck in a negative place. Isolation prolongs grief. Get the support of your coach and your own definition of a higher power whether it’s God, the Universe, or your Angels to help guide you and if you wholeheartedly want to create your best life, I highly recommend having a thriving action plan. I believe that no single person, book, incident, or thought is enough to assist you from such darkness into the light of the life you dream about. It’s not as challenging as you may think. You deserve the wonderful life you are meant to have.

Implementing a thriving action plan can give you a comforting hope that can embrace you while finishing your plan because your soul knows you’re taking the necessary steps in making changes that are good for you. By focusing on the best memories you shared with your loved ones rather than the pain it can help liberate you.

Action Planning Steps – for the stages of grief

An unimaginable loss shouldn’t hold you back from living your best life.  You are not broken.  The pain reflects your capacity for love, and you weren’t meant to torture yourself forever by loss.  Picture yourself immersed in a life you love.  Take the first small step and outline your plan now!

Changing Subconscious Thought

Examples of thoughts people experience after loss:

I feel dead inside

Why did this have to happen?

Will I ever be happy again?

Life is hard

Why are people so heartless?

How will I go on?

It is helpful to be aware and note the source of your thinking pattern. Note the constructive thought and replace it with a new constructive information needed, because the thought doesn’t serve you or seem possible.

For instance here are some examples on how to reword the way you are speaking:

  • Life is impermanent and I’m meant to fully live after losing a loved one
  • It makes sense that I feel empty and anxious at times because of everything I have been through, but I will live in the present moment where there is a great place to feel great peace and joy.
  • I must not try so hard to understand why certain things happen in life, so I will not spend my precious energy looking for answers I will not find. I am fully present in the present moment.

When you have old constructive thoughts, don’t fight them. Let them come and recognize it as a habit from your subconscious mind. As soon as possible focus on the constructive thought and action you noted to replace the unconstructive thought or use one of the other ways to refocus.

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